BlogHer '07: Privacy Vs. Exposure

A big thread of conference conversation among women bloggers who write about themselves and their families on the very public web is, interestingly, privacy and exposure. One of the best sessions I've been to at BlogHer explored whether exposing the details of your family's lives puts family members at risk, and the down-the-road ramifications of writing about kids before they are old enough to tell their parents what they think about having their childhood shared with the world.

People often ask Tara Hunt—who blogs at HorsePigCow and says she lives her life out loud, Twittering her wherabouts, sometimes writing about her 14-year-old son (who sometimes writes about her on MySpace)—"Aren't you concerned that people know exactly where you are all the time?"

Her response: "It occurs to me, but I've always trusted human nature. Maybe I have a weird, naive way of thinking that human beings are naturally good."

There were lots of shared experiences of odd "stalkers" and nasty comments leavers letting bloggers know they know where they live, but most agreed that the chance of something physically bad happening to them or their family members is rare. "It's much more likely that I'm going to be in a car accident this afternoon than someone is going to assassinate me," said Susie Bright, who writes about sexuality and politics. She did say she never blogs about her 10-year-old or her personal relationships because it's their lives to write about, not hers.

When an audience member asked, "Where is the line between developing a thicker skin and actual threats that can put you in danger?" Ann Crady, CEO of Maya's Mom, a social networking site for moms, said that the likelihood of something bad happening is extremely low. "The line is the law," she said.

Crady said the goal of Maya's Mom is to create a place for moms and dads, but mostly moms, to talk with each other. But she would never market it as "safe" because "nothing is safe in life." That said, Maya's Mom gives members the choice of whether to keep journal entries and photos private or to share them. "We are empowering the individual mom to make those decisions."

Crady said she decided to blog publicly about her family because she believes the benefits to her family far outweigh any possible safety issues. Her inspiration is the letters her mom wrote to her father during a three-month trip with her kids when Ann was young. "It's the only narrative I have of my childhood, and I've read them so many times," Crady said. "I don't write my journal because I think I'm a great writer, because I'm not. I write because I want us to remember the details of my kids' childhoods."

Check out Suzanne Reisman's post about the session on BlogHer, this live blogging post on the session by Risa Beckwith, and Tara Hunt's "The insidious danger of danger" post on how the fear of danger can keep too many women quiet. Then chime in below.

Related: Baby Pics on the Net: Public or Private?