Is Somebody Spying on Your IM Session?
Tue Jun 27, 2006 10:31AM EDT
See Comments (55)
I'm all in favor of families setting rules about Internet use and I'm even in favor of using technology to help monitor and filter things for age-appropriateness. What I'm not in favor of is spying. Yet, I'm hearing from more and more parents who don't bat an eyelash when they talk about their obligation to spy on their kids' emails and chats.
So a queasy feeling came over me as I watched a demonstration of ChatChecker, which secretly monitors the computers in your home. ChatChecker seems like a noble effort and a worthwhile piece of technology. It's absolutely free (a premium version with more features is available for a fee) and it's developed by Imbrella, a company that really seems to care about doing the right thing.
ChatChecker works with AOL's AIM instant messenger (not AIM Express), Microsoft's MSN instant messenger, Yahoo!'s instant messenger, ICQ instant messenger, Trillian's instant messenger, GoogleTalk, and many of the third party instant messenger clients that use these protocols. MySpace IM support will be available any day.
According to the manufacturer, ChatChecker is quite impossible for a child to detect on their machine unless they're some sort of hacker-in-training. The software processes every TCP/IP packet on the PC, extracts the instant messages, and stores them on the ChatChecker website.
To use it, you download and install a piece of software on each PC you want monitored. IM conversations are stored on the ChatChecker website, or you can choose to be alerted when words you've deemed worth flagging appear in a message.
Products like ChatChecker (which, by the way, are also sold to be used in corporate environments) play an important role in providing tools to help parents make decisions about Internet use in their homes. I don't want the software to go away. I just hope that parents will, unless unusual circumstances warrant spying, let their children know that their computers are under surveillance. And I hope that Imbrella, a company with obviously good intentions would take language like "secretly records and captures your kid's IM chats" out of its promotional materials.
Grocery stores have made us comfortable with signs like "this premise is under surveillance." There's no reason why computers can't be under a watchful eye, either; just put the sign up. What do you think? Is it OK to secretly record your kids' computer conversations?
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47 Posted by wfbailey2@sbcglobal.net on Thu Sep 3, 2009 10:43PM EDT Report Abuse
Yes, I feel it is appropriate when there are so many child molestors out there looking to have sex with young children. And our children are so nieve to what is going on and they are so trusting. Just look at the young girl that went to kiawut to meet this guy. If her parents and a chat checker they could of been aware of what was happening before it went to far. So I salute the parents that are concerned about their children. :-)
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48 Posted by shp13@sbcglobal.net on Thu Sep 3, 2009 9:21PM EDT Report Abuse
I can't help but wonder if those parents who adamently oppose monitoring what kids are doing on the computer are the same parents who's kids are threatening people, promoting drug use, ganging up on peers, posting drunken pictures of themselves on the net? I'm shocked at the number of kids who do this, even as young as middle school. While there are no guarentees in parenting, kids without parents ever checking in with what they are doing (including on the computer) are getting into things they shouldn't be. How different is it from walking through the room when kids are having a sleepover? (Or is that too big a violation of privacy to do as well?)
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49 Posted by hotcouplew_cam on Thu Sep 3, 2009 4:20PM EDT Report Abuse
njkillas ..... I agree, except some people raise their kids perfectly, and the kids still make bad choices, have breakdowns, etc. If the kids are under 18 and living in your house, then it should be taken for granted that they are "under surveillance". I am not saying to randomly spy on your kids (or spouse). But if one has suspicions that there is a problem, then it gives you an option to find out the truth, be it good or bad.
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50 Posted by kcook_con on Thu Sep 3, 2009 4:48PM EDT Report Abuse
Don't you think it creates an atmosphere of distrust and resentment when you set up your own child for entrapment? Be honest. You don't want them doing that? Set up a family computer or skip having a computer in the first place. Libraries are way too accessible now.
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51 Posted by jakef_2004 on Thu Sep 3, 2009 4:27PM EDT Report Abuse
It inspects ALL your packets. Your allowing a 3rd party to sniff your connection and dump all the data to their own servers. Their TOS would prove to be an interesting read to say the least.
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52 Posted by passem3 on Thu Sep 3, 2009 8:00PM EDT Report Abuse
If children think they are being monitored on one computer, and they want to be secretive, they will just go to the library or someplace else they know they are not monitored and have the questionable conversations. I also think with age comes a lot more deception under the guise of independence...with brains not always capable of making the best decisions for themselves, I think parents need to practice a little espionage to keep up! They may save themselves and their children from a lot of heartbreak from people who are NOT above using a little (or a lot of) deception to get our offspring exactly where they want them!
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53 Posted by gjprough on Thu Sep 3, 2009 4:09PM EDT Report Abuse
I think it depends on the child. I have 2 boys. One I could trust with anything and everything, the other however cant tell the truth to save his life! You know your childeren and what the need to be safe and happy. Just do the right thing.
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54 Posted by bagsistersandbag on Thu Sep 3, 2009 3:01PM EDT Report Abuse
Prior to having teenagers, I, too, thought that if I raised my children up right, then I would be able to trust them and have no need to spy. We are a "norman rockwell" kind of family.......just as average as it comes. We decided to spy with the thoughts of keeping tabs on the "other" kids that our daughter communicated with. Only to discover that she was having sex, drinking alcohol, and making other risky decisions. We were given a view of her life that we had no idea was occurring. It is not easy to parent a teenager and the spy tools available have made us much more informed.
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55 Posted by alisandrerose on Thu Sep 3, 2009 2:50PM EDT Report Abuse
Okay- here's a thought for all of you. I am eighteen years old and female. I grew up in a home with a mentally ill alcoholic mother. I was molested by one of her friends. When I tried to tell her- I was beaten and disbelieved. I was not allowed to attend social events in high school, and my telephone conversations were monitored. The only way anyone ever found out was through the internet, when I told a friend through IM. I was too scared to say anything out loud- but I could write it. Had my IM conversations been monitored, I probably would not be here right now.
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46 Posted by martinjrd@sbcglobal.net on Thu Sep 3, 2009 7:09PM EDT Report Abuse
I feel as long as I am responsible for the child, I have not only the privledge to offer the child all of the protection that I can give, but I have the responsiblity to know hat they are doing whenever and whereever they may be, IMs, chat rooms or out at a friends house. They are still MY CHILDREN.